Sun 16 Dec 2007
8 answers so far!
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There’s a lot of question there. Assumed by whom? By fellow sexists, presuming solidarity and norm-ness? By those who’ve grappled with the negative effects of sexism?
And disavowed by whom, for that matter, and disavowed to whom.
No. Also, wtf?
With any socially-constructed ism like this one, context matters entirely. Sexism doesn’t exist in a vacuum, it sometimes exists within groups of people. It doesn’t exist at all without a societal context and construct. If you’re sexist in your own head only and never commit a sexist act, it’s pretty difficult if not impossible to say that you’re sexist.
Do people assume that others are sexist if they don’t say they’re not sexist? Well that DEPENDS ON THE PERSON, doesn’t it? I personally don’t.
I immediately assume that any man I meet is a sexist unless he makes a point of using gender neutral language early in our first meeting, or, failing that, explicitly disavows sexism. Similar for racism, homophobia, etc. Almost everyone I meet is a sexist racist homophobe.
My answer is “no.” No, I do not assume someone is sexist unless they repeatedly and blatantly make offensive sexist remarks.
You might want to reframe your question or provide more clarification.
Goodness gracious. Of course not.
I have no idea what is meant by this question. Are we talking about individual or institutional sexism? In the former case, no, in the latter, yes.
I immediately assume that any man I meet is a sexist unless he makes a point of using gender neutral language early in our first meeting, or, failing that, explicitly disavows sexism. Similar for racism, homophobia, etc. Almost everyone I meet is a sexist racist homophobe.
Was that a joke?
I guess I can’t prove that I’m not sexist or that — on some level — we’re not all sexist. But I think people would who know me would all vouch for the fact that I’m about as non-sexist as a guy can be. My wife out earns me, and I’m fine with that — I’m fine with people knowing it. I used to subscribe to “Ms.” Etc. And yet I use gendered pronouns.
I know WAY more female actors (actresses, whatever) than male ones. Most of the best ones I know are female. Yet I’d still say, “Whenever I hang out with an actor, he always wants to know about what shows I’ve directed.” I don’t think all actors are male; I don’t think male ones are better than female ones.
Also, I’ve worked for many fine female bosses (and a handful of horrible ones). Yet I’d write, “If you speak to your boss, make sure you’re respectful to him.” I don’t think bosses should be me; I don’t assume they are men; I don’t prefer working for men. (I recently got weird looks in my all-male, geek-filled office, because I suggested that we should hire some women. I hate working anywhere unisex. If feels odd. I hate working anywhere were upper-management is mostly male or mostly female. It feels unhealthy.)
I guess that would make you think I’m sexist. That’s sad.
There’s a lot of women supervisors where I work that make me a little turgid when I think of them. Does that mean I’m sexist?