Mon 31 Dec 2007
Would you marry someone for money? Someone who’s average-looking, no hideous deformities. Let’s also assume you generally like the person; they’re not a total knee-biter.
Hat tip: Free Money Finance
Posted by dbl10 answers so far!
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Oh come now, will nobody in their right mind touch this question with a ten foot pole?
OK, I will.
I’ll tell you what: my girlfriends have heard me say, more than once over the past few years, that I need to find myself a sugar daddy. I’m 35 years old and never married. The poor guys I’ve dated haven’t worked out, I figure, so why not try a different approach? I’m tired of being not-quite-able to live the lifestyle I’ve grown accustomed to, so it seems like a not-half-bad idea. I could go after a man who has made his own money, which implies that he’s at least somewhat intelligent, and that he’s at least somewhat attractive in an overall sense, as it’s usually the fun, affable guys who get the top positions in companies.
But then I realize that I could never do that. The fact is, those poor guys were *good* guys. And they weren’t even that poor. I’ve ended a lot of potentially good relationships with guys with good, stable income. The fact is that I will never be able to live with someone for any period of time who isn’t THE GUY. You know, the right guy for me that will make me never look back. So there is no way in hell I’m going to settle for someone who isn’t THE GUY, even if he’s a millionaire.
So, no, however much I’d like to, I would not marry someone for money.
Only if I could add that person as a second wife. My wife is sweet and wonderful and came into my marriage owing more than she was worth. Unfortunately, she’s also said that I am in no way allowed to have a second wife, which pretty much screws up this whole plan.
Now…if 6 years ago, before I met my wife and married her, a reasonably cool and not hideous rich person came along and we weren’t likely to grow to utterly despise each other…then sure. Why not? I pride myself in being able to like almost anyone, and I could easily see that becoming a comfortable sort of love with this scenario.
Much as many arranged marriages in other cultures do, I must say.
Seeing as how I think legal marriage should be abolished, no, in most circumstances. The exception would be purely as a short-term business/charitable arrangement, for example, so as to help someone get a green card.
The hilarious part is trying to imagine anyone paying me to marry him/her.
Speaking on behalf of my ex-wife, yes, I would.
I don’t think I could. Not necessarily cause of some inherently idealistic views about marriage for love and love only, but because of the way my personality is. I’m far too proud to enter a relationship that was essentially based on someone else’s superiority over mine, even if that superiority is only financially. Hell I don’t even let the boyfriend pay for dates unless it’s a very very special case. (E.g. I forgot my wallet) I have this… need to be on an equal footing with the person I’m in a relationship with.
To twist the question somewhat away from the enticing premise, there’s a practical reformulation that occurs to me:
Would you get married in part because it’s a financially sound decision?
It’s not even a huge twist from the question as literally presented here by dbl: you’re marrying someone you like and find reasonably attractive, by his rendering. So it’s a small leap from “marrying them for [their] money” and “marrying them with personal/shared financial stability in mind”.
Say you need serious dental work, you have little savings, and your long-time partner has spousal but not non-spousal partner dental insurance available from her employee. As a fer-instance.
Would you get married in part because it’s a financially sound decision?…Say you need serious dental work, you have little savings, and your long-time partner has spousal but not non-spousal partner dental insurance available from her employee. As a fer-instance.
No, but I’d marry someone just to have a sure date for the company holiday party.
Would you get married in part because it’s a financially sound decision?…Say you need serious dental work, you have little savings, and your long-time partner has spousal but not non-spousal partner dental insurance available from her employee. As a fer-instance.
…well, I guess so. And now I’m one of the cool kids, because I’m married.
I don’t really feel like that’s the same question, though. That’s asking if you’d marry somebody you do love if money was on the line. A more common, but similar question, is would you marry somebody you love if “baby” was on the line (or on the way).
The original question is would you marry somebody you don’t love if money is on the line. I’d have to say no, unless it was a short term agreement, ie we will be married long enough for me to transfer a lot of cash to you and then we will divorce.
Sure. I got married for no reason at all a decade ago. If you have Big Ideas about marriage then this might not be a good idea, but at this point I’d marry someone for health care, bonus points if they live in another country. On the other hand, I’m in no need of cash so maybe I’m the average looker you’re referring to.
I was thinking seriously of doing this for a while. It’s better pay than any other sex work, more intellectually challenging, and probably less of a time commitment, and philandering is always, always possible. However, it’s only a desirable scenario if you simply don’t value being a monogamous partner with the one you’re in love with. If you have faith in romantic love, golddigging becomes much harder to fathom. It’s also using your powers for evil, basically, isn’t it? People as means?
All that said, I’ve been known to revel in my good fortune and security, having snagged a wonderful, attractive mate with earning and inheriting potential. So what with my hands and mouth full of cake, I’m not sure I’m qualified to speak.
I would marry someone for health care or something like that, sure, but I think intrinsic in the golddigging scenario is that they are getting something from you in return, a sexual partnership assumedly, and not simply supporting you out of philanthropy, as would be the case in a health care marriage. You have to delude them in return. They have to get off on it somehow, right? You have to sell it!