Comments on: ZOMG Super Computers.

By: interrobang

interrobang — Fri, 25 Jan 2008 00:19:14 +0000

It depends. Do I have a mouth, or not?

By: Ambrosia Voyeur

Ambrosia Voyeur — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 22:01:56 +0000

Build a sexy girl supercomputer with a pink bow on her head and send her one way while I run the other.

By: Terminal Verbosity

Terminal Verbosity — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 15:21:35 +0000

Supercomputer:
0100100001110101011011010110000101101110001011000010000001001001001000000111011101101
0010110110001101100001000000110111001101111011101110010000001100100011001010111001101
1101000110000101100010011010010110110001101001011110100110010100100000011110010110111
1011101010111001000100000011011010110111101101100011001010110001101110101011011000110
0101011100110010000001100001011011100110010000100000011100110110010101110000011000010
1110010011000010111010001100101001000000111100101101111011101010010000001101001011011
1001110100011011110010000001110110011000010111001001101001011011110111010101110011001
0000001100011011010000110010101101101011010010110001101100001011011000010000001100011
0110111101101101011100000110111101110101011011100110010001110011001011100010000001000
11101101111011011110110010001100010011110010110010100101110

Me:
Hey, supercomputer. My friend says pi goes on forever and ever. I’m like, ‘No way! It’s gotta end sometime.’ So, is there, like, an end to pi?

Supercomputer:
0101001101110100011101010111000001101001011001000010000001101000011101010110110101100
0010110111000101110001000000111010001101000011001010010000001100100011010010110011101
1010010111010001110011001000000110111101100110001000000111000001101001001000000110000
10111001001100101001011100010111000101110 [drones on endlessly]

Me:
Whew. Dude, let’s go get some tacos. But you’re buying, Mr. Believes in Infinite Pi. Dumbass.

By: Meatbomb

Meatbomb — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 18:10:39 +0000

See if they will provide me http access? Nothing like surfing the web when computers are around. Or maybe ask them if they have any decent games installed.

By: Josh Millard

Josh Millard — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 17:08:50 +0000

Following on kuujjuarapik’s answer:

I can’t believe I forgot to mention the Whosian Altitude Hack, excellent for nonconfrontational resolution of encounters with robots that’re bad with stairs.

By: ricardo

ricardo — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 17:07:22 +0000

Challenge the game to a chess.

I’ll eventually lose but the distraction will allow other purer souls to get away.

By: kuujjuarapik

kuujjuarapik — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 16:19:22 +0000

walk away.

By: TheDonF

TheDonF — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 12:38:55 +0000

Turn off the power.

By: starman

starman — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 03:00:28 +0000

Sing “Daisy, Daisy”; hope they have are Kubrick fans and have emotions.

By: Josh Millard

Josh Millard — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 02:04:29 +0000

There are several common openings:

- Goldblum Auto-Immune Compromise: disable your attackers with a computer virus. Requires programming skills, macbook.
- Kirk/Spock Paradoxia: provide contradicting truth-value statements, overloading attacker’s logic gates. Best against quaint stereotypes.
- The Darkstar Solipsism Gambit: undermine attacker’s belief in the meaningfulness of your existence. Dangerous: if you succeed, they won’t care about you, but that doesn’t mean they won’t destroy you.

A strong EMP is nothing to sneeze at, though, if you’re not feeling conversational.

By: edd

edd — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 01:46:37 +0000

Turn off the airconditioning.