which apparently is really difficult to comprehend.

I have a bunch of books on the subjects, but the Internet has robbed me of the ability to focus for extended periods. Or maybe I am just getting old.

Oh my, I could have written this word for word. I am at a similar place right now, trying to reconcile what I believe about feminine spirituality and divinity and a strong connection to the wild spaces that surround us with a return to a confusing sort of liberal Christianity.

Electrical wiring.

For some reason my brain keeps parsing this as an emphatic statement of fact instead of as a list. People really do love electrical wiring.

It seems that Christianity is, in so many ways, perfect for me - it allows me to relish and celebrate my personal heritage, my family and community’s history and heritage (there’s always something a little unsavory about western converts to eastern faith) - it’s a labyrinth of cultural appropriation and it’s a world wherein I’m a political minority and, therefore, have a dog in the fight. It’s clean and crisp - it has a model.

But there’s something wild in my heart that is seeking that “time in the desert” - Christ’s departure after his baptism - something we rarely talk about outside of the context of temptation - something in me that wants to leave the systems and books behind and find God under a rotting log or in the warmth of the crocus bud or the song of a chickadee in spring. I don’t know where to find that in my current faith journey.

I don’t understand why we’re not all deliriously happy most of the time, myself included, given the astronomical odds of any one of us ever being born in the first place.

We we ever have a largely proactive society as opposed to a reactive society?

(On a much more prosaic level, regular expressions. I understand each symbol, and I understand the basic idea, and I can even construct simple ones, but an intuitive understanding escapes me–and I have tried.)

Love.

Electrical wiring.

Me too. I think all the “odds” stuff is bullshit, whistling in the dark, but it’s certainly conceivable that there are other intelligences out there, and it would be nifty as hell, but I’m never going to know. Dammit.

(Life, consciousness, and the nature of Time I already understand. Send self-addressed stamped envelope for brochure.)

I’ve got to agree with ssg here and say consciousness or, more specifically, what the human mind is truly capable of.

What are the answers you think you might never get?

Whether we are alone in the universe. I’m pretty sure extraterrestrial intelligence exists out there — I mean the odds are pretty damn good — and I also think that one day we’re going to find evidence of it or be contacted. But I’m also pretty sure it’s going to be after I’m dead. Makes me sad. Unless, you know, they’re trying to steal our bodily fluids or harvest our eyeballs or something.